It is an art as well as a science

It is crazy I have never been quite so introspective as I have been since I started my weight loss journey.  In some ways weight loss is pure science, we know what calories are and what each food is in terms of calories, how much exercise burn in terms of calories, and we know which foods are better for us than others and even some that are really bad for us. That part is pretty straight forward and very much based in science.

The art part comes in because we are human and as individuals and as such we are not going to react the same what to everything.  If you are doing your own journey you probably notice that there are some foods that seem to stick with you no matter what, and some it seems you can eat a ton of and that doesn't affect you (even if the reality is different than your perception).  And let's take into account that people can have food allergies, and some people can eat onions and they don't bother them and others cannot eat them without feeling miserable.

I am finally coming to terms with this and this is a really hard thing.  The whole process of changing your lifestyle is hard but just wrapping my head around the fact that I cannot just have someone dictate what works exactly for me and follow it without thinking.  Instead, I need to pick an approach that seems healthy and sane and then work it for a bit and really pay attention and make tweaks and adjustments that make sense for me.


For now, my approach is:

• exercise more - my goal is 5-6 days for 30-40 minutes
• eat fewer calories and stick to a daily count that was recommended by my doctor
• The main way is that I need to retune my idea of what a normal portion size is and stick with that.  It is amazing how I need to unlearn and relearn this.
• eat more real food, this is actually not that difficult because due to me being home for school and then working from home and let's not forget my high blood pressure.  That led me to do more cooking from scratch so that I could control my sodium levels.
• be forgiving of myself because I am human, I will make mistakes sometimes on purpose and sometimes not on purpose.  I simply need to be gentle and restart the process because a single mistake is not insurmountable.
• make changes as I see fit while still staying in the 'guidelines' of the 'experts'.

There is one pitfall to my introspection and really taking the time to catalog how I feel, and that is freaking out about every little thing.  One of my measures of success is how I am feeling energy-wise, I feel like overall I have managed to raise my energy baseline and am not as tired.  I also feel that I am happier which is good, but in the process of determining those intangibles I notice a lot of other things like:

• my skin, sometimes I see dry patches and think OMG Sjogren's, I am doomed.
• my hair falls out OMG side effect of the thyroid meds.
• my tongue hurts I am having some new and special side effect what did I eat???

It is crazy I know because they are most likely nothing.  Your skin goes through cycles and it is not consistently dry anywhere it is normal.  Also, hair goes through cycles I swear every fall it seems like I shed more than normal and then it slows down.  And that tongue thing, I need to be careful when I eat crusty bread or rolls because I can scrape it and then it hurts.  All perfectly normal and stuff that I probably would not notice if I wasn't hyperfocused on the changes I am experiencing.

This is another area that Mr. Padawan is very helpful in, he helps me see the forest for the trees and keep perspective and not freak out.  I also have started to do something I learned on Happier with Gretchen and Elizabeth, write down your symptoms.  This works for me so I don't have to keep mentally poling myself does this hurt still, when was the last time it hurt?  I mark it in my calendar and then forget it, I have looked back and and really a tongue thing, a day or two max, that jaw pain I swore meant root canal was only two days and in retrospect I was super stressed and I know I was clenching my jaw.

I am really loving the write it down and forget it concept so I can review and get a better idea of if something is a persistant problem, and intermittent problem and when it started.