PadawanOfHappiness

Raise you hand if you are done feeling like Charlie Brown as he plays football with Lucy (aka various government officials).   Yeah me too.  We are quickly closing in on one year of living in this Orwellian time of Pandemic lock down.  Remember when it was 2 weeks to flatten the curve?  And then it was just through the summer, and then  once we get a vaccine and now Dr. Fauci is saying wear masks until 2022.  I call BS.  There has been a steady drumbeat of "follow the science" and similar slogans, which is fine if those yelling out that line actually followed science and didn't use science as a weapon of control.  While I was reasonably skeptical of many of the recommendations I was willing to go along with masks and social distancing because I understood that safety was important and we didn't know a lot about the virus.  I could live with a certain amount of so call flip flopping, provided there was data to support the change, you know scie...

Last week the pressure began to build again and I didn't recognize the signs.  The stress of the lock downs which includes added stress from my kids because they have extra emotional, mental, and physical demands from the stress and don't know what to do with it.  Not that we adults do but we are slightly better equipped to handle it and they are not, so they turn to us their parents. The stress of yet another school break which means a break in consistency that kids crave, especially right now with all the turmoil.  The stress of the news, and cancel this and that and who is bad, and who is not, yada yada yada.  It was just too much.  I started to get more irritable easily and just really wanted to hide, and I was ripe for Obliger Rebellion. In the past I have been able to identify the pressure and the need to blow of steam and do so before I went crazy.  This time not so much, I didn't recognize it until I was in the midst of it and then I just decided to...

They day is not even over and this is one of the worst days ever.  I hate this remote learning situation it is not a good set up for my family.  I get that some kids like it and it works for some families but this absolutely SUCKS. I have been very happy to hear that one of Padawan's teachers is very upfront about the fact that some of the things they need to do don't make sense but they have to do them anyway.  She has also been open about this not being ideal and that we are all struggling together. One Padawan needs a lot of help and really responds differently to a teacher in person and than he does to me.  I know he knows this stuff, we are still in the review stage but it he just has a mental block and refuses to do it.  I have spoken with professionals and his behavior is not uncommon and quite frankly I am at the end of my rope and so is he.  He doesn't like it and we are really out of coping mechanisms there is only so much I can do. I just want ev...

Prior to listening to episode 284 I felt that so many in the world (including myself) were going through some form of Obliger-rebellion since obligers are the largest group of the four tendencies in her frame work. Rubin has found that most people fall into the Obliger category. Rebels tend to be the smallest group.  Source Business Insider I feel it because even with the controlled opening of my state it is still so restrictive, the rules are changing, and you are almost always being judged.  While some people will find you lacking and others will approve your actions, the end result is that it is exhausting.  So exhausting that I really want to give the big old 'bird' to everyone and everything just because I am stretched so tight that I am ready to snap at any moment. Obliger-rebellion occurs when Obligers meet, meet, meet, meet expectations, and then suddenly -- they snap . They say, "This, I will not do!" and they refuse to meet an expectation. This refusal ca...

I would love to pack up my kids and husband and send them to spend the weekend with my in-laws.  I would stay home, I would have snacks and beverages, books, and cheesey tv. I wouldn't have to get out of my pjs and the dishes could stack up and wait, the noise I would hear would be my movies, my tv, or my music. Seriously, I love my kids and husband  and they have been pretty great all things considered.  But today is day 70 and this introvert is coming to the end of her rope even more rapidly than I had been in the past.  My best guess is (and please pardon the mixed metaphors I am about to toss your way) now that I can see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel and I am fairly confident that Lucy is not going to pull the football from me again, it has triggered something in me that says it is ok to break rather than bend now. It is amazing what we can do as humans and how resilient we are, and for that reason along with my faith I am still reasonably sane....

In my previous post, I was frustrated by my up down up down cycle and then, of course, gaining a ton (reminder a ton is all relative) of weight.  At the end of the post, I figured out what caused the weight gain and I felt better because I had a reason why I gained it; I had drastically undercounted my calories.  I wasn't happy it happened but as long as I could explain it I could deal with it. Well despite my issues earlier in the week yesterday I hit the target I was aiming for.  I lost 5.2 lbs in 23 days which is an average of 1.58 lbs a week, again a totally respectable number and within the 'suggested' rate of losing 1 to 2 lbs a week.  Go me!  So why isn't it enough to keep me going? The numbers on the side in blue are to represent the increments not actual weight! :) I am not feeling all that great, my face was killing me, sinus issues are not fun.  And we had a wind advisory last night with insane winds.  I DO NOT LIKE THE WIND, especi...

I just finished listening to episode 207 of Happie r and I had a very visceral reaction to Listener Question: How can a husband encourage his wife to get on board with a 19 for 2019 list? And as they described the question (location about 25:11) the gist is that the guy travels "a ton" for work and his wife is handling 3 kids and he wants her on board for decluttering and complete their will.  And he admits that this mostly falls on her.  He also believes his wife to be an obliger. I don't like to assume malice but my reaction was what an idiot and he is so clueless.  Gretchen rightly pointed out that you cannot create a 19 for 2019 that you want done and hand it off to someone else.  I was talking back to the podcast saying this guy has no clue what the list is for,  this is going to back fire so badly on him. This is the perspective I am coming from: Wife and mother of 2 kids and I have primary responsibility of the kids because I work from home. I...