I did it, now what?

In my previous post, I was frustrated by my up down up down cycle and then, of course, gaining a ton (reminder a ton is all relative) of weight.  At the end of the post, I figured out what caused the weight gain and I felt better because I had a reason why I gained it; I had drastically undercounted my calories.  I wasn't happy it happened but as long as I could explain it I could deal with it.

Well despite my issues earlier in the week yesterday I hit the target I was aiming for.  I lost 5.2 lbs in 23 days which is an average of 1.58 lbs a week, again a totally respectable number and within the 'suggested' rate of losing 1 to 2 lbs a week.  Go me!  So why isn't it enough to keep me going?
The numbers on the side in blue are to represent the increments not actual weight! :)

I am not feeling all that great, my face was killing me, sinus issues are not fun.  And we had a wind advisory last night with insane winds.  I DO NOT LIKE THE WIND, especially the huge winds that prompt weather advisories.  My legs also hurt a lot of cramping.  Did I mention it is still freaking windy and has been all day?

Today I have conflicted feelings, I am really happy with my success and proud of my progress but I am also feeling like ugggg I don't want to do this anymore.  It is hard.   This feeling had to hit me, I have a long road to travel and of course, I was going to hit a point where I felt at best ambivalent, at worst I would think it wasn't worth it.  What is a person to do?  I need to respect my feeling and work with them and acknowledge it might be time to take a strategic break.

What I mean by that is to allow my self to be less vigorous with my tracking and exercising, while simultaneously acknowledging that this is not an extended vacation.  Today I have no idea what I had calorie-wise for lunch and I am ok with that because I had no easy way to track my Irish egg rolls.  But I did track dinner and it is what it is.  I am still not sure what to do about the exercise, I did a bunch of extra walking today and I am just flat out tired.   I will make a decision a bit later and I will not feel guilty.

I also know I am an obliger and my accountability for this weight loss journey has been my apps.  I also know that I am very close to obliger rebellion and without me taking the break I did today for a pressure release it was likely that I would have blown up my progress in a big way.  Not only would my progress on the scale be halted and reveresed it would have also done an even bigger issue with my mental well being.

My eye is not only on my short term goals but also on the long term goals, and it is worth it to remember that sometimes losing a battle means you can win the war.

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