Well that escalated quickly
I knew it would come eventually, I was optimistic based on the week that we have had that it would take longer than this to actually come. That sense of being trapped.
I cannot say this enough that my family has been great and I really could not ask for more we are all doing our best given the circumstances. But here is the situation I am an introvert, I am used to working from home by myself, which means that I am used to being alone for roughly 7 hours a day Monday through Friday. Now I have Mr. Padawan and 2 little Padawans with me ALL DAY LONG. Ok, I do get a 20-minute walk for my #Walk20in20, most days but sometimes one or both little Padawans go with me. Also one of my Padawans is a toucher and when he is anxious he gets even more touchy it brings him comfort, but it drives me nuts, I don't really like touch and most definitely not when I am stressed like now.
But based on last night's dream and the thoughts in my head today, I know that I did a great job so far but it is obvious that I need to make changes. For this reason, I am looking forward to the weekend, this will be a great time for me to reset a bit. While the number of people in my household will not magically decrease over the weekend, it will mean that I will have more opportunities to just disappear for longer. The only focus Mr. Padawan and I will have is to function and stay alive :) we won't also have to juggle getting work done, so Mr. Padawan can take the lead a bit more to give me a respite.
For our family it makes sense that I take the lead M-F, yes I have a job outside of being wife and Mom. However, the reality is that Mr. Padawan's job is the breadwinner, and that has to be the focus. This means that yes it takes longer for me to get my work done and in reality, I will be doing some work this weekend, and that is actually a way for me to get some alone time. Win Win!
I am sure that other introverts are going through similar thoughts and feelings and we will all get there at various times. I am happy to know that based on the Happiness Project and really all of Gretchen's books I am getting much better at recognizing things and making a change before they spiral out of control. I have recognized potential problems early, probably because I was anticipating them, and am ready to make tweaks.
Starting this weekend, I will get alone time and then also make sure that next week I carve out more alone time M-F. What that looks like I am not really sure just yet but I know between myself and Mr. Padawan we will figure it and try something new.
I cannot say this enough that my family has been great and I really could not ask for more we are all doing our best given the circumstances. But here is the situation I am an introvert, I am used to working from home by myself, which means that I am used to being alone for roughly 7 hours a day Monday through Friday. Now I have Mr. Padawan and 2 little Padawans with me ALL DAY LONG. Ok, I do get a 20-minute walk for my #Walk20in20, most days but sometimes one or both little Padawans go with me. Also one of my Padawans is a toucher and when he is anxious he gets even more touchy it brings him comfort, but it drives me nuts, I don't really like touch and most definitely not when I am stressed like now.
But based on last night's dream and the thoughts in my head today, I know that I did a great job so far but it is obvious that I need to make changes. For this reason, I am looking forward to the weekend, this will be a great time for me to reset a bit. While the number of people in my household will not magically decrease over the weekend, it will mean that I will have more opportunities to just disappear for longer. The only focus Mr. Padawan and I will have is to function and stay alive :) we won't also have to juggle getting work done, so Mr. Padawan can take the lead a bit more to give me a respite.
For our family it makes sense that I take the lead M-F, yes I have a job outside of being wife and Mom. However, the reality is that Mr. Padawan's job is the breadwinner, and that has to be the focus. This means that yes it takes longer for me to get my work done and in reality, I will be doing some work this weekend, and that is actually a way for me to get some alone time. Win Win!
I am sure that other introverts are going through similar thoughts and feelings and we will all get there at various times. I am happy to know that based on the Happiness Project and really all of Gretchen's books I am getting much better at recognizing things and making a change before they spiral out of control. I have recognized potential problems early, probably because I was anticipating them, and am ready to make tweaks.
Starting this weekend, I will get alone time and then also make sure that next week I carve out more alone time M-F. What that looks like I am not really sure just yet but I know between myself and Mr. Padawan we will figure it and try something new.
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